So remember that post I wrote about showing up 24 hours early for an appointment with my therapist? Well, I have an even better one for you! Yesterday, I went to meet a good friend for lunch. We planned to meet at 11:30, and amazingly, I arrived a few minutes before the appointed meeting time. I fully expected to see my friend there, as she is always punctual, but I was the first to arrive.
I waited for several minutes and then I started to wonder… (again, this particular friend is never late). So like the last time, I went back to the emails we had exchanged to confirm (what was actually this time my growing suspicion) that I had, yet again, goofed. YEP! I had! The email exchange we had specified the first FULL week of June, and this year June began on Monday – the second day of the week. So this time, like last time, I was early. But unlike last time, this time I was a FULL WEEK early.
But more importantly, unlike last time I did not berate myself. My first thought was not “I’m such an idiot,” or “I’m so stupid.” I actually chuckled to myself. THAT, my friends, is progress.
So I called my friend to verify that we are indeed meeting next week, and she confirmed the same. She was kindly, and unnecessarily, apologetic. I was the one who goofed, after all, she wasn’t. And you know what? It was ok. I laughed about it with the woman who took my carryout order (all was not lost – I still got to eat what I was looking forward to eating that day!) and told her I would see her again next week, I am able to meet my friend next week, albeit on a different day, no harm was done, and again, I was kind to myself.
This might not seem like a big deal, but to me it is. I can see the change in myself. I am starting to shift from the one who shames me the most, to the one who forgives me the most and shows me the most grace. It’s a daily practice to show ourselves grace, but I can tell you based on yesterday’s experience, that the practice pays off, and the victory, even though it’s one moment in one day, is pretty sweet.